Wednesday, October 12, 2016


We were celebrating, with the best sparkling wine

I did celebrate too…
The escape of the string of bubbles in my flute glass
Trapped in a dark gloomy bottle for years, Ageing to perfection
and then the wait, until chosen
Just to spilled all over someone, a fountain of foam and mess
Or to be left in a glass stained with lip color or cigarette ash.

 I did celebrate too…
Their  freedom from darkness
Ready to face a new world, a realization of the power in them
To entice human emotions- of fantasies, laughter, dreams and tears

I did celebrate..
So did the bubbles……….
No more Carbon dioxide..Just bubbles of happiness

Tuesday, November 25, 2014

I dont live there anymore

No Matter how hard the past, you can always begin again (borrowed from Buddha)
Don’t judge me by my past…I don’t live there anymore…

My Life was an open book..something that I was proud of
I assumed others around me would be too.
And I could trust them…but none did- Lesson No.1

So I don’t live there anymore…the closed books are left behind…
No more close to me

My life was an open book..I liked being that
But my weaknesses were taken advantage of...
And they were targeted, rather than embrace the goodness on the other side of me

So I don’t live there anymore…I will not let such negative minds into mine
They Stay away from me

My life is a new book…with a new cover and feel
Its changed…with illustrations, positive thoughts, and a new confidence
It has few readers, but Im happy with the number..
It was never the number, but the quality of the numbers

I now live here….with readers whom I call my extended family…

Sunday, August 10, 2014

Back to Basics

Its nice to be back here...Long seven months that have been do i call it? Am glad its over....Every time I think there are no more potholes left, I fall into an even deeper one.....Somehow this time I have bounced back fiercely..The year has brought families closer, I have said Goodbye to some people forever (cant handle the negativity anymore), asked my PAST to stay away and not depress me, and asked my PRESENT to lead me to LEAD a beautiful life.

Hoping that our trials are almost over, I got back into a dream that I've always had. This dream s finally that helped me believe that 'Its better late than never'. Thanks to a few friends and a little push, its finally done....A food blog,,that has helped me improve my culinary me learn new things in blogging and photography, professional and personal side in blogging and a lot more that makes my days better.

In fact, isnt that what all of us strive to do on a daily basis? to be a better human being...? Remember Nasarudeen Shahs question to Farhan Akhtar 'apne liye bhi kuch karte ho?
Well, this is my version of apne liye....

I dont know how i would manage in this ocean of bloggers, but Im in no hurry, nor upto any competition. Im just glad it happened, and could make a few of my friends cook better stuff...I wonder who quoted 'Sharing is Joy'...It indeed is...

And yes, Im happy to be back from another hiberbation here...back to my online diary.....

Sunday, January 5, 2014

These Tears

These tears...
They bring me closer to God..
or rather
God chooses to bring me closer to him 
Through these tears..

Dear God, I will be closer to you
by being a good Samaritan
but these tears and the pain....
Can i loose them somewhere?

Can you take them away from me?

Wednesday, December 4, 2013


I feel it was just yesterday that I held you in my arms for the first time
Listening to those little coo coo sounds
Watching the tiny little face and feet and hands
still pale from the labor that both of us went through
My pain was no more as I fell in love completely
With this little angel that was sent with utmost perfection
Papa must have cried as he welcomed you into those strong hands
Promising to be your guard forever…

I feel it was just yesterday that you smiled at us
And turned towards us
Stretching those arms to hold everything around you..
Tiny movements that built up until you could sit..and move
Your grandparents could not control their emotions as they watched you grow
Into a sweet little angel..

I feel it was just yesterday that you asked for finger food
Ensuring it was from papas plate..
Wishing to be carried everywhere we went
Enjoying the winds, rains and trees…
We are lost in that innocent smile of yours
Let that remain with you forever dear…

Thursday, November 7, 2013

As you grow…

The grace (Anika) that poured down to us from heaven above…
You turn one year today..
And all I can do is cry…tears of joy…
And all I can see is this beautiful smile that makes my day beautiful
And all I can murmur is a word of thanks to the Almighty
And all I can pray is for your safety and good health
And all I can promise is the best of everything in our capacity
And all I can think of you and you and you my dear
Happy Birthday my little one
You make our life Complete

Love , Appa and Amma

Thursday, April 11, 2013

The Little bundle from above

God sent me a little bundle…
He said it was a special gift….
crafted with a lot of attention and time

He said it was unique piece….
There wouldn’t be a duplicate…
But when looked at carefully,
It will have all things special about me and my mate..

But he said….
Now I leave that precious gift with you…
To nurture, to love and cherish…..

I carried this unopened gift in my belly
The longest 9 months of my life…
We couldn’t wait to open the gift….
And it teased us…
With little kicks and bumps…

The lil gift made me glow and feel beautiful…
It banished my pains and troubles….
It brought my family closer..
And made our lives beautiful…

And then the gift unfolded
Ten days earlier than expected..
Surprising and exciting us at the same time
The pain was excruciating….
But I knew it was the same for the lil one…
And we both cried as she showed herself to us……

She was beautiful
Just like I expected,
Just like I dreamt of
Just perfect as promised by the one above

Her dad beamed with pride as he held her close to his heart
Her grandparents couldn’t control their joy
And I yearned for my baby as I lay in bed
I was no more the teeny weeny girl…
I now got my biggest promotion ever- Motherhood….

Monday, July 9, 2012


Why do we love songs from our teenage and youthful days? Even if the world has better songs and bands, and whole lot of known and unknown options today???

I know now….

Its not just the lyrics, the melody or the movie nor the concert that you had been to, that makes them special. Its not even the number of times you listened to those songs, at a time when we had the liberty of being pretty jobless..Its not that we are too busy juggling with life's responsibilities, that makes the songs of today probably less appealing than the songs of ten to fifteen years back.

It’s the whole lot of memories attached to each of those songs that make it special for us, even today. I know it sounds stupid. But it sure it’s the same for most of us…

Yesterday, on my way back from work, the radio was ablast with songs like mein pareshaan…..pareshaannn and rowdy rathore and many more, which at any day would boost my tired spirits. And then out of nowhere, the title track of Kal ho na ho played..and there….Time just stopped still….i was reliving some olden days. In fact to think about the song, all I did while watching the movie was cry bucketful of tears, but yes, those were the days of college, getting into crowded buses, waiting for long queues without complaints.., blast the music on weekends, dance in our hostel corridors…

Listening to those songs during a sleepless night on a bus from Bangalore to Calicut, meeting friends at coffee day, while our favorite music played in the background….the music that played in our friends car, the songs that were dedicated to our first crush……the 'numb' song that was perfect when i was at my feistiest....for me the list just goes on and on.

And when I listen to the infamous 'Hotel California'…it takes me back to a pink background with the picture of a satan and the title ‘Hell freezes over’, much to the utter dislike of my mother…That was my first rock album…gifted on my birthday by a friend who was dismayed at me drooling over the boybands of those times…

Although the satan did have an effect on me, as I moved from pop genre to Aerosmiths and Metallica’ and the Floyds….the boyzone, savage garden and the backstreet boys still don’t fail to bring back a smile even today…and I’m surprised I still remember the words as I sing along with the track…. And I still carry all those cds and gifts with me, wherever I go, from kerala to Bangalore, to Chennai and to dubai…

I don’t listen to them, except for the occasional reminder of them from radio stations that I plug in to. But I’m happy I have them with me….I took pains to get hold of every single album in those times…and to even think of the number of times I would arranged and rearranged folders and wrote them into CD’s, to walk all the way to my grandparents place to watch MTV most wanted and Channel V’s Billboard toppers….

Now all you need is a click, and every song from any part of the world falls right into your palm, into your ipad or iphone in milli seconds. Am sure The Jonas brothers and the GAGAs and Minaj's, Kanye's and Labrinths are good, but I don’t think I would have any memory that would get attached with the song….they would just remain as good songs and videos.....

Monday, May 7, 2012


It’s a bizarre feeling …..what I m going through right now…..I am  supposed to be at my happiest…but it comes with a lot of clauses..ifs and buts….I’m tired…my stomach feels as though its gonna be upset anytime soon….My allergies keep teasing me all the time..Shameless things…oh I miss my earlier skin…..

But then, I have this glow on my face, which my husband agrees too (blush blush), am being pampered a bit (Hit ‘like’ 100 times), and I can hog on anything right now (except that those shameless things- allergies creep out of nowhere and flash their teeth from time to time)

Yet, with all this comes a feeling of Godliness.. I cannot explain that now here…..

It’s supposed to be one of my wisest phases- yet I miss the teens and the twenties..the number ‘THIRTY’ makes me feel older already……………….wish ’18 till I die’ really works… I don’t want to be wise…I just want to still be me…..happy and depressed at the same time, cribbing at things I don’t have and dont like, howling at the top of my voice, run around freely without thinking of responsibilities….

you can’t do all this when you re thirty….or rather You shouldn’t….or in fact that’s what you’re told… I’m in a complete state of nostalgia…I don’t agree to be thirty…..the word itself sounds horrible and ‘dhirty’

Monday, February 27, 2012

Ooh la la..Krispy Kreme

It was one of those days, when I didn’t have to cook, and could enjoy an instant meal at the food court below my office. Mind you, this was the wrong food court to be. The food price could almost touch the gold rates, although this term is a lil stretched, but then I decided to explore a bit….

I was looking for something nutritious and a filling lunch…and as my eyes scanned the entire food section of so called ‘low carb’, low fat’, ‘non-greasy’ and boring menu, I stumble into this small cute box of Krispy Kreme doughnuts near the billing section…..

The placement of that box, in marketing terms was the USP. Everyone who comes in to the pay section would not miss the warm, gooey, cute little donuts. Oh, and how I fell for them shamelessly! Guess my chemical sensing system was at its highest peak that day, or working overtime! I just could not resist the signals that my nerve cells around my nose and mouth were sending to the brain. How do I explain those delicate, deep fried, sugar glazed, warm circles of flour, butter and sweetness??? The petite Philipino sales girl smiled devilishly, as she knew that I required no coaxing here. There were 3 of them, and I bought them all….

Now I could go back to my work cabin, and devour these sugary treats in less than a minute….but then I wanted to just remember every single biteand decided to opt for the benches beside a beautiful view of some of the best architectural creations. The weather was at its best with a pleasant wind, and a warm sunny light. And I opened the box, and snared at the Florian coffee shop sales guy who was at his break, with a cigar….I was not ready to take in some smoke along with this savory goodness….He either got the signal, or he was due to be back at his table….he moved away.

I was alone, with the wind flowing and spoiling my hairdo (or whatever was left of it), and I took every single bite, not missing any ounce of flavor, the softness, the fresh smell of butter and flour, and shamelessly picking up the glazed bits that fell from the bites onto my lap ( I can be messy at times)….but then, It was nothing short of a food paradise…Being reminded that this was just a portion of the food paradise, I got up, walking back, promising to try more….:-)))

Sunday, February 19, 2012


Another year passes by…A very troubled year ! the year of ailments and mental tensions….2011 taught me a lot of things  that the yester years could not…

Simple things…like, Health is wealth……. difficult realisations that beauty in the eyes of the beholder is mostly skin deep ( I completely disagree with the proverb) and a renewed realisation that whatever happens ….your family stays with you….

The year also taught me to accept things as they come (although it was not easy), the year was the biggest in terms of my patience being tested, and I guess I succeeded in coming out sane.

I have finally started to feel comfortable in UAE, its gonna be my home for at least a few years now, and I have learnt to like the mix of cultures and languages, the traditions, its just another way of seeing life, or rather experiencing.

Now I look forward to 2012….A very exciting year according to the Mayan calendar…when the 13th b’a’ktun gets completed…the year the world awaits to witness a major change….And I hope for some major achievements, as I yearn to learn new things, be it cooking, general knowledge or career. I want to enjoy simple things, and be of help to others. I want to get back to reading, a habit that I lost in the last year. As my wishlist just climbs the ladder, I also pray and hope that the world finds peace, and people around me are able to appreciate life better.

Enough of my verbal nonsense…Back to the four letter L.I.F.E, which does not fail to surprise me, always!!

Monday, February 6, 2012

These happen only in UAE

 1) You can live here for 100 years, but you can never be a citizen (hope it changes someday)

2) Forecasting the population increase, The Makthoums have created artificial islands (Palm Islands)- oh, but too expensive for the common man…Lets hope all the guys born with gold and silver spoons move to the artificial sites, and we would be spared the heavy real estate prices.

3) You have the best of best products from across the world displayed…but 85% of the population can only do a window shopping of these high priced, high quality products. And they call it one of the best shopping destinations in the world.

4) The total rainfall in a year is hardly 10 cms. And when it rains (or rather drizzles), they call it ‘Heavy rainfall’  

5) I believe they have more construction workers than actual citizens. Way to go Employer! 

6) The Metro rail system rocks. A trip from Deira City Centre to Mall Of Emirates is just 4.6 dirhams. Don’t even dare ask me what the taxi fare would have been for the same 

7) Most of the Arabic songs have the word 'Habibi' mentioned somewhere (This calculation is only based on the small percentage of the songs I’ve heard) 

8) Some of the most beautiful women in the world. Had not the religion interrupted with hijabs and other rules for women here, Kate Moss, you would just be moss! ((Please, no offences to the religion) 

9) The world’s only 7 star hotel and the tallest building are here 

10) The city is home to more than 200+ nationalities…do we have so many countries? Everything that you see here is a ‘Work in Progress’, which means this is just the beginning…

Tuesday, November 29, 2011

The man who knows me

A song that explains a lot about me, and therefore very dear to me....
I used to have it as my brief, although long description on my Orkut page, in those years where social networking was given birth in the form of Orkut and blogs (Facebook did come later, although it washed away the rest along with it , like a Tsunami).

Anyways ,I need to post it here, for old times sake!!

My life, is extraordinarily bare ( don't assume anything from this line)
I fought the fear and chased the pain.
My life, doesn't need to be explained,
I chose to walk the line as one.

Sometimes, I live upon my island, Cut off from emotion and its pain.
That's when, I am tempted by the waters,
Waters that can take me far away.
So I'll just keep on walking down this open road,
Hoping someone, somewhere needs me.
So I'll just keep on walking down this open road,
Talking to the man who knows me,
Yes he knows me, the man is me.

My life, was once full of people's faces,
Brought to me by love, which isn't strange.
My life, had the goodness of blue waters,
A day's a day for all I used to say.

Sometimes, I can sit and cry my heart out,
Drowning in my autocratic ways.
That's when, I am tempted by the waters,
Waters that can take me far away.

My life, is now full of people's faces,
Within the light of change I pulled away.
My life, shows that no man is an island,
I've exchanged the piece of life I cut away.
Now you won't see me walking down that open road,
I've found someone now who needs me.
No, you won't see me walking down that open road,
I've found at last the man who knows me.
Yes, he knows me and the man was me, the man was me.

Wednesday, July 20, 2011


I guess we need not be perfect,
or have things in our own perfect way

We can afford to make a few mistakes
cos we learn from them....

Failure lets us know how special success and happiness are....

Thursday, May 19, 2011

The Yellow Umbrella

My first umbrella- a promotion from the sticky, plastic smelly raincoat to the world of colorful umbrellas…..

I didn’t require the umpteen sessions of Marketing Management to appreciate the commanding influence of advertising then - The POPY ad Mazha Mazha kuda kuda…. just drove us sisters nuts to a point where we were not ready to hit school without one.

And one fine day, my parents come back after work, and on the holder of the ancient Rajdoot bike were 2 beautiful yellow colored umbrellas….and much to our delight- the brand POPY….

No words of joy would come, just some clicking noises from the semi toothless oral cavity of mine. I grabbed the umbrella to see the specs and features. It had the traditional U-shaped handle (in plastic yellow too), but had an automatic open system with a push button. The fabric had small flowers on them, and the steel was shiny…Brand new. Then came the routine ‘female’ check of whose is better. As usual, the green monster struck the right chord and I felt that my sisters umbrella, which was exactly the same shape and color, fabric and size, but for the print, looked better. But then the feeling passed. And we waited impatiently for the night to end in order to to inaugurate the beautiful thing the next day.

The first day was a dreamy affair of carrying this new and beautiful accessory with pride, and show it to the whole world. The second day passed with the same enthusiasm. And the third day. Alas!! No signs of clouds….While others around me were happy that the rains did not spoil the sheen of their brand new uniforms and shoes, mothers happy about a day or two of sunshine to dry clothes, and the roads to drain down the muddy water, the two of us waiting for a heavy downpour.

And on the fourth day, when we had given up all hopes of a drop of rain, as we were just getting off the school bus and walking the short distance home, the rain gods came down in all their fury, drenching anything and everything. Before we were allowed the glory of inaugurating our new push-open umbrella, we were drenched to the skin, not to mention our bag, books and lunch kit, with a puddle of water in our shoes….but who cared. We could only hear the music that fell above our head, and deliberately walked home slowly……………..

That’s the story of my Yellow umbrella!!

Tuesday, April 5, 2011


It may not be one of the best,
It may not interest you…
Some of it may look silly

But this blog is my creation…
Yes, it s all out of impulse.
And the RAM is me, the ruling Aries!!

Wonder why people are jobless enough to spoil someone else’s life
I have no interest in anyone else’s life….
Happy if things are fine with the rest of the world, else it’s their problem to solve
As for mine, This is my life…
Let me live it… in peace …with my family!!

My friends are those who have understood me and love me for what I am
For the ones who couldn’t, STAY AWAY!!
You don’t deserve a milli second of my time ever!!!

Wednesday, February 9, 2011

New Friends and Enemies!!

My new friend- Anti histamines
My enemies- weather and (‘god knows which’) food!

My constant Companion- Rashes, fashionably called as 'histamines'

Tuesday, February 8, 2011

Another rainy day in Dubai

I got out of the metro that was packed like a group of hens taken for slaughter, all grumpy!. The womens compartment has always been like that- impenetrable. Had difficulty in takin out my tail (the duppatta) away from the mob. I was finally out, ready for my regular walk back home, the walk that makes me think!! silly things-…the trip home….family planning….the new recipes to be tried….my dream home…Issues in Egypt….rapes…shopping cravings…and pollution…

But this time the rain interrupted….People around me complained abt the ‘pour’, but little did they know that it was just a drizzle….I still could walk home in the rain, but didn’t wanna take a chance after my recent skin attack called pityriasis rosea…

I waited by the side of the huge Burjuman mall that was inviting me with its DSF offers… the usually clean roads and pavements were getting a little muddy after the recent sandstorm that spread sand everywhere including my nostrils and on my buttery balmed lips..chey!!

Nobody carried an umbrella, as rains are not something that you can cherish or look for in Dubai…nor do they have any season…they just come in miniscule portions, and go away by the time you blink twice….and then I saw the Yellow Umbrella!!

(to continue...)

Monday, January 10, 2011

Crazy thoughts of an Average looking girl

Lucky are the ones who have straight hair…
They don’t have to get it straightened,
No damages nor expensive treatments, nor hair fall

Lucky are the ones who are fair….
They are called beautiful almost everywhere
Even the ones with the worst of ‘features’

Lucky are the ones who are not ‘FAT’
They can wear anything
From fully clothed to ‘almost there’ outfits

Lucky are the ones who have not been ridiculed
For being what they are….
They don’t have to go through the pain…

Am sure they would be ‘schizophrenics’ who think otherwise, or ‘children of god’ who would brand me a ‘sinner’ and scream at me for such thoughts….
But…No point…it can’t be changed….its the truth which each one of us wish to forget

Oldest of thoughts die hard……

Tuesday, January 4, 2011


Every year….there was a resolution
A resolution that didn’t see success beyond 3 or 4 days, max a week
Even if it was the smallest of resolutions, like getting up at 6??

This year’s different
My resolution’s to have no resolution at all!!!

Thursday, December 30, 2010


When I made friends,
It wasn’t for fun,
Nor was it for a period of time…
Nor was it based on gender and caste,
Nor expecting something in return……….

It was…..for a lifetime……………

Tuesday, December 21, 2010

The end that brings happiness- Christmas

No matter what happens throughout the year, Christmas is a time when we oblige to forget all our worries and sorrows, and get set to celebrate.

You don’t need to be a follower of Christ to enjoy Christmas. Yes, to me it rings music in the forms of carols, joy to the eyes with the decorations, cribs and twinkling stars everywhere, taste buds tickled with a whole palate of mom’s Xmas goodies and icing cakes, tears of happiness and remorse at the birth of Jesus with a prayer of thankfulness and a hope for forgiveness, moments of happiness with family and friends as they get together…….

It doesn’t stop here. Holidays after a stressful week or two of studies and exams, the best time to meet your dear and near ones by travelling half of the world, a time to receive Christmas gifts, and cakes, some of these customs, being followed every year, time to booze and party, time for shopping and what not….and a whole load of stuff to make us smile away to glory

I have tears now, tears of happiness, as I remember that some of my best memories with family and friends have been during the last ten days of of all these years. Be it College, Graduation or work, I have made myself free every year, just to enjoy the spirit of Christmas and to be with my greatest asset- Family….and friends

As I look at my beautifully decorated tree here, far, far away from my near and dear ones this year, I pray and hope that they have a wonderful Christmas and a great year ahead, a year of health and happiness for my parents and sisters, a year of prosperity and peace for my friends, and mostly a year of success and surprised to the both of us!!

Monday, December 13, 2010

Chikku and Me!

Watched Marley and me for the second time yesterday, and all I could think of was my Shepherd Chikku……

A word of thanks for the love and companionship
- for the patience to listen to my ‘chatter batter’
- for the laughs and the clutter
- for just being there during some of my most depressing times in my life!!

You were a wonderful companion, although neurotic and unruly!!
Miss you!!!

Wednesday, December 1, 2010

Go Back in time!

I really wish I had an option to go back...
In my Control panel to change settings
To be bold , and say what was right,and justify it
To fight for what was mine...troubleshoot
To redo things that I had done wrong...
And repent for things that i cant undo...

I wish i could save the most sweet moments in the prime side of my brain...
and leave the bitter ones to the Recycle bin...
and shift delete the most unpleasant ones forever...
Wish that I was formatted well, to make my life look picture perfect
paint it with colors and cliparts of happy days
Wish the forlorn days could be minimised and the euporic days maximised
Filter only the genuine crowd around me,
and no viruses around playin with my emotions

I wish I could just slot in 'New' and start all over again!!

Tuesday, November 30, 2010

And…Connect And….Network….!!

The world took a huge twist with Social Networking…Although there were lot of social networks before, Orkut being my first, along with others like Hi5 and a lot more that my ‘grey matter’ just cannot commit to, but then Facebook took the trophy for social Networking

I was just getting used to Orkut and the gadgets along with it, and then came Facebook. I decided to stick with my first one (in management terms called as ‘resistance to change’), but then Facebook just started to breed and became this next big thing…Not having an FB profile was considered out of the crowd, Not part of the digital age….

And then I entered the new world of so called ‘FB’. I was already late. Millions of messages were passing around thru the ‘Walls’, photos and events….i did a marathon in order to connect with all my friends and acquaintance spaces…caught me breath and then updated ‘here was I’…..’me tooo’!

I am sure phone bills would have had a nasty downfall, with all Telecom companies cursing the new baby-Facebook. We found our lost friends, found our abode where we could write what we wanted, express our fears, joys and sorrows, take a public poll on our recent hairstyle and DSLR Cameras, update our status with even a mere monologue. We had all the happening news at a flash- someone getting married here, someone’s baby shower, somebody’s office grumbling, and someone else’s elephant trip in Kenya

Suddenly, everything was known to everyone. Even an acquaintance in School was your friend, wishing you on your birthday, your enemies or your competitor were screaming loud that they just hit a promotion and that you were nothing!!

Every ‘click on FB’ just made Zuckerberg a zillionaire even after sorting out all his legal bills. One of the reasons why Zuckerberg created Facebook was to take revenge on his ex- girlfriend, to prove to her that he was not just another geek in Harvard (No offense to you Zuckerberg, I am just referencing the movie ‘Social network’).

My explanation to use Facebook was to be part of the new age, and not be pulled back into the ‘old gen’ types. But all that it has done is to increase my medical bills (extensive use of laptop- head ache, eye issues, irregular body balance), immense stress due to the constant updates that I see around which makes me wonder if I was living my life to the fullest…and less productivity. I fact there’s a recent poll that says FB is used more during the weekdays than the weekends…that explains the productivity

Now, just because I don’t bullet down the advantages doesn’t mean that’s FB is ‘EVIL’. I still have an ID, active throughout the day, with 600 plus friends, pics and status updates, but on a comparative scale with lesser updates (this is already givin me a headache). I still would keep the id…in fact habits rarely go away…..until somethings replaces it in this digital race!

Unlucky are those who don’t have it…but lucky are those who don’t feel the need for it!!

Sunday, November 28, 2010

the RAM!

The RAM is quite unique
She's special, different, weird, misunderstod, innocent yet headstrong

Only another RAM can even partly understand another RAM!!
Its not easy to be one, but its still great to be one..

Someday...she'll be understood...accepted....wanted..
but guess it will be too late to change things!

Sunday, November 21, 2010

Back again..

Guess the change in a lot of things around have created a lazy halo around me…and the fact that the last few words or thoughts haven’t created the desired effect in my readers made me feel low….but guess what? I don’t really care!!

After all, this is my blog…my area…I can write anything here….I am not writing to win a competition…am not giving any political ratings or an intellectual publication.. It’s all about ME!! Me with the horns (just meant the golden ram- Aries), with all human feelings and emotions (‘sentimental’ being the most predominant), mistakes and impossible dreams and all crazy thoughts…

The last few months were days that I probably may not ever get in my entire lifetime…something that I have always wanted to….. RELAX ….Do Nothing!! Do whatever I like….Yes..3 months of absolute nothingness…

The entire lifetime of studies, work and a whole lot of other active pursuits, without a break ever, has been one hell of a crazy ride... ok ok I agree…its something that all of us go through…however, a very small percentage of the populations do get to take this so called ‘break’…just to relax…no worries

But this is how I relaxed…..slept slept slept…….no brain activity….then came the experiments with cooking…Thank god I moved in with my husband sans my in-laws and parents….My hubby had to eat it all, the burnt, sometimes uncooked, missing ingredients, strange tasting dishes of mine…then practice made it almost perfect….and then came the Internet smiling at me thru my jet black VAIO- and along with it the new found love for social networking….regular updates on FB….farming on Farmville…..until my back and VAIO screamed HALT….Oh No..Worries never left me!!

The arien clock kept ticking.. Ariens, among their other troubles can never be interested in anything for a long time…so then came the boredom….The thing that I had longed for now became a huge pain in the wrong place….Constant nagging made my hubby regret his decision of bringing me to Dubai…..and finally the painful realization of the market and the economy….I had no job!! And none had a vacancy to even offer one…

I missed the crowded streets of T Nagar….gossipping, shopping and enjoying with friends, Fabindia, the beautiful beaches of Calicut…Amma’s Appam and Stew and a whole lot of other things…and the long desert stretch with its ultra modern buildings and paradise shopping failed to help me out….except for my poor tolerant hubby who was my only friend, guide and philosopher..he he!!

Now am back to my old days…and how I wish for some more days of nothingness….Now I think of zillions of things that I could have done during my free days…

All I can think of is a Malayalam proverb- Ikkarey nilkkumbol akkarey pacccha!!

Friday, July 9, 2010

Our performance

Oh, but this life’s a stage
An arena where we need to play our characters
Knowingly, unknowingly, selfishly, selflessly
Some tragic, some adventurous, some romantic and peaceful
Some quite strenuous, some flexible and effortless
Some adding value to another character

We perform our roles as artists- amateur or experienced,
As hero, heroine, villain or a small supporting role.
but even that calls for changes,
The best part of it and the worst part of it
We don’t get to play the same part forever….
However magnificent or inferior it is

The world of performance drives change….
And we are forced to believe in that change
Else what would make us go forward?

But what about the original behind the mask?
Does that change colors?
Or does it stay behind the infinite walls of the mind?

At the end of the stage play, we are judged by our performance
Excellent, bad, wonderful, or trash!
What would I be rated at last?

Thursday, July 8, 2010


‘I’ll be there for you’ of Rembrandts used to be the exact feeling that I had about friendship
In fact most of the people around us would agree

Parents said ‘keep a distance’- just to ensure that we don’t get hurt
But we reprimanded them for saying that
We were basking in the intimacy with our gang of friends
The best days spent together
The worst days of fighting over things
And the glory of getting back together again

School, Tutions, Hostel, College, Workplace, Neighbours, College bus, train, bus stop and where not
We had friends all the way…. girls, boys and kids, uncles and aunties………

Some of them were with you, through thick and thin
Some surprise friendships stayed; and we thought it won’t last
Some faded away with time,
And some still kept in touch, in spite of distance
Some left us- no explanations, pain or regret,

Will I tell my kids the same things?
Will I let them be ‘I’ll be there for you’ to their friends?

Well, I still have few for whom I still sing ‘I’ll be there for you’
Life has not been that hard….but….you never know……….


The period of hibernation is over,
With renewed energy, the blogger embarks on another journey…..

The hibernation was to concentrate on new things,
New things that the body and mind had to get adjusted
Adjustment to varied things that the ram was aware of
Yet kept aside until the thirteenth hour

The fire in the ram is too powerful for the others
Not that it burns or hurts anyone who draws closer
But the ones who cannot take it move away
The horns of the ram are just for caution,
But the ends are blunt

The impulsiveram is not a perfect writer
These words are just an expression of the ram's worst fears and profound joys
Just like the name, it comes on impulse,
Just on impulse